I like Mother's Day.
In 2011, on my first "official" Mother's Day, when I was a mother with a child who'd been born, I tried too hard. I wanted a happy day for me, I wanted a day for my mom and I didn't want to leave out my mother-in-law either. Plus, Madison had three living GREAT-grandmothers, and I had this idea of gathering ALL the moms together in our home. Madison had a really rough bout right before this, and it was important to me that it be an amazing day.
It was not. Adam did his best, and we had a great morning, but there is nothing amazing about hosting two sets of parents, three aging widows, and two siblings, when you have a baby who is still dealing with some pretty major issues. Not to mention that other issues decided to blow up THAT day, DURING the event, and pretty much soured the entire thing.
So in 2012, when I was a mom of two, I changed my tune. I would celebrate the moms in MY life on Saturday. But Sunday was for ME. Being a mom was HARD, I was full time at home with two under two, completely buried in the life of a new stay at home mom of newborn and toddler, and I wanted my one day. Starting that year, we had breakfast together, and I took the rest of the day OFF and AWAY. I love my family deeply and truly, but I wanted ONE DAY. Just one.
Ever since then, Adam has been amazing. He gets it. We do breakfast, and I head out for some alone time, and then he brings the girls to his mom's. While they're gone, I might steal back home for some quiet time in the house. Later, we have dinner together, which I neither cook, nor clean up. It's a perfect day.
This year, Adam broke from tradition. He didn't want to bring the girls to his mom. He wanted to bring her here, to our house. He SWORE to me it would not change my day at all. I still could go out. I would not have to plan, prepare, serve, or clean up the meal. I would not have to clean the house.
I was still skeptical. I didn't buy the idea that I wouldn't have to clean before (I knew the dining room would have to be dealt with, and that's my room to handle). And although I would be participating as a guest, I would still have to be in "we have company" mode, not "I'm hanging out in my yoga pants" mode. And sure, he'd cook and do the initial clean up. But I knew I'd be dealing with the aftermath Monday morning. I was cranky. I felt pretty selfish feeling cranky, but I was cranky. I like my in-laws, but I was also spending all day Saturday with MY family. Where was my ONE DAY?
It went fine. I was still a little resentful, but Adam kept his word, and aside from cleaning the dining room before and putting the china away on Monday, he handled it. I did have to be social. Yet there was a silver lining.
My father in law brought over the car brochures and the potential specs for my new car, including the kind of details that dealers know. My brand new, first model year, PLEASE hurry up and get here car was becoming REAL.
Best. Mother's. Day. Surprise. EVER.
I'll take it.
