Every once in a while, usually while on Facebook, I'm so glad that my youngest child is five years old, and I'm not trying to figure out this whole baby thing in the dawn of crazy internet advice. When I was pregnant with Madison, the big thing was Baby Center or What to Expect. You joined a birth month group, or another relevant group, and that's where you got your "sounding board" advice. Sure, people argued, but they argued more "my doctor said" versus what "your doctor said". Or whether you were a Babywise Person or a Dr. Sears person. Maybe those groups migrated to Facebook, because Facebook was a little more smart phone friendly, but they stayed the same.
Was there drama? Of course. There's always drama. But still very focused.
Today? There are blogs. And memes. And groups for every sub group of parenting. You can find a study or a link or an article or a meme to back up pretty much any style of parenting or opinion. People are totally comfortable ripping strangers apart for absolutely everything. There are actual groups with the sole purpose of finding parents they don't agree with to shame them.
Now here's the thing: New moms have questions.
They have a lot of them. They were just handed a human to care for and raise. They are already paranoid that they are screwing everything up and and going to kill the baby, or, at the very least, mess them up for the rest of their lives because of something they did when the baby was four months old.
And now they are bombarded with articles from every view point spouting that if you do this or that you are definitely right and if you do the opposite you are definitely going to regret it for the rest of your life.
Should you be rear facing? Is it safe for forward face? Is it time for the booster? WHO DO YOU ASK????
Solids? Baby led weaning? Purees? Cereals?
What about the crib?
What about language?
I JUST WANT TO DO WHAT IS NORMAL!
I'm so glad I don't have a new baby right now.
I know, that's not helpful to moms who do. So when I meet a new mom, and she's totally stressed out about who to listen to and what to do, I'll steer them toward some rational sites, but then, I'll remind them that most instincts are good. You can't really trust anyone but yourself. If you're trying to be a good mom, you're probably already doing a great job.
And hey, if you want confirmation, I'm sure you can find at least one site to agree!