Thursday, January 5, 2017

I'm Supermom....But Only In Name

So in my partly-crunchy (ok, barely crunchy), Pinterest-mom-wannabe life, I've come across a few tips that make me sound like much more of a Supermom than I actually am. I can sit in my MOPS group, or on an online advice group, and sound really on top of things and even a little bit clever as I spout my Google and Pinterest garnered knowledge.

I know how to get gum out of basically everything.

I know how to get crayon out of basically everything.

I know how to use essential oils to repel insects and spiders.

I know the magic stain fighting mixture that can get everything from dirty tubs to cloth car interiors cleaned.

As a homeschool mom, people expect me to have all kinds of tips and tricks to help with various issues, and, between my internet searches and my former life as a teacher, I do have some ideas for reading, for behavior, for fun playtime indoors.

On the internet, I am Supermom. I gather a lot of information, and I have a pretty good memory for that kind of stuff. I have a really poor memory these days when it comes to which child is which and why I walked into certain rooms, or where I left my morning coffee so I can find it and drink it before someone spills it, but I do remember that hot vinegar will pull gum right out of clothing, or that clove oil repels stink bugs.

In real life....

I have a daughter who, despite all my attempts at prevention, gets gum on everything.

I have another daughter who seemed to miss all the instruction on where it's appropriate to draw with crayon.

I have a fear of spiders (and all bugs, but spiders send me into honest to goodness panic attacks) that is so severe I'm afraid of what might happen if I encounter one when Adam is away. So I repel them with every weapon that I can research so my kids don't see me paralyzed with fear and develop phobias of their own.

I have a house that is always stained. Always, always, always. Clothes. Rugs. Carseats. Sheets. I love buying new things, but I hate that they will be stained within hours of coming home, because my children are magic like that. They don't restain the old stuff, they find a freshly cleaned or brand new piece of fabric every time. 

I feel inadequate as a homeschool mom almost every day, especially when Madison starts poking around instead of doing her work, or suddenly seems unable to read, or write, or remember her math facts that I know she knows.

I feel like a fraud. All the time.

I know a lot of things, and I can give solid, researched advice. But if you saw me in real life, you might not want me to. It's a messy life. It's a low patience mom life. It's an imposter life.

Underneath that Supermom cape of knowledge and experience is a mom in leggings and a sweatshirt who just lost her tempers because the family room is a disaster again. Who wears her scuffy slippers as she walks across a floor that looks like it hasn't seen a mop in weeks, and gets into a car that smells like old food.

But I also have a feeling that I'm not alone in this feeling. I know a mom who posts things that she does with her kids, and people think she's just this amazing mom with a wealth of activities, but she knows that she just searches the internet because she's ready to tear her hair out. I felt this way as a teacher (will they figure out that I'm just figuring everything out as I go?), as a writer (will they realize that I have no idea what I'm doing?) and heck, even as an adult (does everyone feel like they're just playing house?), and realize that you know more than you think.

If you're're super. And if Pinterest helps you don that cape, it's worth it.

Especially for that magical stain mixture. Capes stain too.
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