Monday, June 10, 2013

How To Take Two Toddlers to the Pool in 25 Easy Steps

I've already alluded to the fact that this summer is going to be very different when it comes to the pool. Last year Reagan sat quietly in her bumbo under an umbrella. This summer she's doing bar routines on railings and scaling chairs. Last summer Madison was afraid of the big pool. This summer she's doing everything she can to let herself out of the baby pool and dash toward the big one. Not exactly restful.

Up until yesterday, I don't think Adam really got that. Often he'll finish a round of golf and send me a text telling me to bring the girls over after their nap so he can meet us there. So far this year he's been surprised when it takes me over a half hour to drive the 5 minutes.

This weekend he got it.

Instead of eating lunch after he played golf, he came home so I could take some time to myself out of the house. The girls had taken earlier naps than usual, so they were just waking up. He told me he was going to take them over and I could join them later on.

Thus, Adam learned what it is really like to take two toddler girls to the pool.

1. Console older child who is crying because Mommy is supposed to the the one to go swimming with.

2. While consoling older child, realize younger child has woken up and is quickly moving from happy babbling in her crib to crying because no one is coming to get her.

3. Get younger child out of crib and console younger child with the leftover goldfish that older child dropped and convince them to watch the end of the Tinkerbell movie.

4. Now that two children are calm, grab bag that Super Awesome Mommy has packed and left out. Load it into car before Tinkerbell is over.

5. Remember that Super Awesome Mommy reminded you that the bathing suits are not in the bag yet. Remember that she said something about where they were, although you weren't totally paying attention.

6. After an extensive search, find bathing suits.

7. Decide against dressing girls at home since Tinkerbell is over and they're getting cranky.

8. Throw bathing suits in bag.

9. Load girls in the car.

10. On the road, tell the girls that it's a 5 minute ride and it doesn't matter that Daddy's car doesn't have the princess CD.

11. Arrive at pool. Take older child out of carseat first.

12. Realize older child has taken her shoes off and is crying while standing on the hot pavement. Pick her up.

13. Set younger child down to juggle older child and the bag more effectively. Younger child takes off across the parking lot.

14. Manage to get both children into the pool area.

15. Stop child one from going into the ladies' changing room and lead them both toward the men's room.

16. Pull out bathing suits. Realize that older child wears tankinis now, which have two pieces.

17. Amid much cursing, leave bag and put both children back in the car. Drive home.

18. Get tankini bottoms and drive back amid crying from older child that her cup is in the bag, which is still at the pool.

19. Bring children back into men's room. Attempt to wrangle younger child into swim diaper and bathing suit while she attempts to run out the door.

20. Realize that while you were working on younger child, older child, confused by the layout of the men's room, has peed all over the floor.

21. Wipe up pee and wrap up wet clothes.

22. Retrieve younger child as she escapes into pool area. Put her as far into the men's room as possible to contain her as long as possible.

23. Wrangle older child into tankini with one hand, while holding younger child back with the other.

24. Realize that since the initial arrival at the pool, the snack bar has closed. Text wife asking her to bring underpants, a sundress, and snacks. And to hurry.

25. Bring girls to tiki bar for lemonade and (ahem) something stronger. Collapse in chair around baby pool...until you realize that one has escaped.

I don't think he'll be complaining that it takes me too long to get over there again.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Real Time Web Analytics